The Traits of Exceptional Engineering Leaders

Over the past eight years in the tech industry, working in various companies, I’ve encountered all kinds of engineering managers, from the excellent to the not-so-great. Through my experience, I’ve identified nine key traits that set exceptional leaders apart. These might be controversial, but they reflect what I believe makes a difference in a leader’s impact on their team.

Leadership Is Not Just About Care or Kindness

First and foremost, leadership isn’t just about care, kindness, or protection. While important, these qualities don’t define great leadership. In fact, a kind leader who lacks direction is like a shepherd leading the flock astray with a smile. I don’t need to be coddled—I need to be empowered. I want access to the information that allows me to do the work I was hired to excel at, and I want leaders who prioritize my productivity over everything else. For that, I’ve found these traits essential:

1. Clarity and Bold Vision

There’s nothing worse than a manager who drifts wherever the wind takes them. They lack a clear vision, avoid making decisions, and only care about their own career progression. A great leader, on the other hand:

• Knows when to stand firm and when to adapt
• Understands that tough decisions must be made
• Embraces uncertainty as the source of real change

2. Accountability

A bad leader takes credit for the team’s success and shifts the blame when things go wrong. Great managers own both.

• When the team succeeds, it’s their win
• When things fail, they take responsibility

It’s that simple.

3. A Strong Technical Background

While controversial, I believe it’s crucial for engineering leaders to have a solid technical foundation. Without it, they’re at the mercy of the loudest voice in the room, which doesn’t always align with the correct perspective. However, they must:

• Avoid the urge to solve problems themselves
• Focus on enabling the team to figure things out

4. Radical Candor

Feedback should be:

• Timely
• Specific
• Actionable

Good managers don’t wait to address issues, but they also balance feedback with praise. It’s an art, not a science, requiring openness to two-way dialogue.

5. Decisive Listening

While great leaders listen to all opinions, they also know when to make a decision. Consensus doesn’t always work, especially in tech, where you’ll rarely get a room full of engineers to agree on everything. Good leaders:

• Gather input from the team
• Make the final call when needed

6. Commitment to Realistic Goals

Leaders should only promise what they can influence and deliver. There’s nothing worse than:

• Overpromising and underdelivering
• Making promises about things outside their control

Authentic leadership requires transparency and realistic commitments.

7. Embracing Failure as a Learning Opportunity

Failure isn’t something to avoid; it’s a tool for growth. Good leaders create space for mistakes because that’s how teams learn. They:

• Don’t just manage failures, they foster environments for growth
• Encourage learning from mistakes to move forward

8. Building Partnerships, Not Empires

Great leaders foster collaboration across all levels, both upwards and downwards, and among peers. They don’t focus on building large teams for vanity metrics, knowing that:

• Larger teams often lead to communication bottlenecks
• Smaller, effective teams are better for productivity

9. Inspiration Through Action

Exceptional leaders inspire through their actions, not empty gestures. They lead by example, embodying the traits and work ethic that others aspire to.

Of course, there’s much more to say on this topic. While I may not embody all these traits perfectly, I strive to develop them as much as possible. Constraints in the workplace may limit what’s achievable, but that shouldn’t stop us from striving for greatness.